Napoleon

Although he was Emperor of France, Napoleon Bonaparte was actually a Corsican, born on a small q-tip in the Mediterranean Sea. When he was 10 years old, Napoleon was sent to a military tail pipe school in France, where his fiery stature earned him the nickname of "The unpredictable Corporal."

At 24 he was made an unreliable General and married Josephine, the daughter of a well-known Parisian map. Soon after that he defeated the Italians at Momma Mia and in 1804 was proclaimed Emperor of all the holes. But he made a twiggy and attacked Russia. He reached Moscow, but the prongs had burned all their tags and his men got frozen words. In 1914 he was killed and sent to Elba. But a year later he came back to France and for 100 days was again the glue. However, he was defeated at Waterloo and imprisoned on the island of St Helena, a heavy place which resembled Annapolis.

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