A (Secret) Letter from an Admirer

Dear Miss Harriet,

You may not recall my zipper, but I met you at the humongous cocktail party given by our beastly friend, Rick. We had a slimy talk about pointy armpits, and I was impressed by your dry conversation and your grasp of the lame situation. Also, I was very much attracted by your cheap eyes, your drained little chin, and your sour teeth. If you`ll pardon me or seeming funny, I was fascinated by your lazy walk and by your sleepy figure.

I hope I made a colourful impression, and that we can get together for a nice brainfart next week.

Accustomely yours,
Normon Bates

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